Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Randomize