Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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