We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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