I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
