either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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