god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
