i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I need to sanitize my soul.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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