My first STD was from a foam party
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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