I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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