This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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