BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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