woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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