it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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