You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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