Texts From Last Night

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  (517): View more from Michigan

  he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.

  (231): View more from Michigan

  better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.

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  (517): he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night. (231): better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you. http://tfl.nu/vawi
  Replies (3) Good night (843) Bad night (2048)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.

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  (678): i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste. http://tfl.nu/3anp
  Replies (21) Good night (4859) Bad night (1807)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities

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  (812): i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities http://tfl.nu/t8hr
  Replies (7) Good night (5508) Bad night (999)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge

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  (203): just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge http://tfl.nu/b456
  Replies (10) Good night (994) Bad night (6851)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?

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  (240): He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half? http://tfl.nu/4690
  Replies (48) Good night (4168) Bad night (1428)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You know, be my cock's hype man.

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  (732): You know, be my cock's hype man. http://tfl.nu/5yns
  Replies (3) Good night (2588) Bad night (816)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.

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  (757): Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful. http://tfl.nu/da1d
  Replies (5) Good night (1904) Bad night (1679)
• Favorite

  (519): View more from Ontario

  If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes

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  (519): If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes http://tfl.nu/ayyp
  Replies (29) Good night (4122) Bad night (1267)
• Favorite

  (806): View more from Texas

  You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.

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  (806): You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard. http://tfl.nu/t4z0
  Replies (6) Good night (2406) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.

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  (708): Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here. http://tfl.nu/8u6g
  Replies (3) Good night (785) Bad night (518)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him

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  (843): Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him http://tfl.nu/dncw
  Replies (4) Good night (1087) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....

  (1+44): View more from

  The baked potato bra?

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  (+44): I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered.... (1+44): The baked potato bra? http://tfl.nu/bc4d
  Replies (4) Good night (573) Bad night (770)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.

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  (815): We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever. http://tfl.nu/gebx
  Replies (0) Good night (774) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  So like, boobs.

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  are you really going to start every conversation like that?

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  (616): So like, boobs. (1-616): are you really going to start every conversation like that? http://tfl.nu/4tw0
  Replies (3) Good night (597) Bad night (190)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.

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  (928): My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left. http://tfl.nu/85y4
  Replies (2) Good night (466) Bad night (315)

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