Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize