You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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