Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
