i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Randomize
