I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I need moral support for this bender
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
