Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Randomize
