Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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