i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
Need sex. Gaining weight.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize