if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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