Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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