im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Randomize
