I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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