do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
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I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
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I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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