Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
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