Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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