Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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