Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS