I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
is that a dick in a sweater?
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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