What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
