First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
