doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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