I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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