i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize
