they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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