I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.