Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
