i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
