dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
