You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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