I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
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