Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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