There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Just puked most of my soul out..
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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