Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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