weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
