After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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